Blog

  • Searchers

    birds fly backward
    climbing into descent
    calamity, cataclysm, and contrary
    jumbled, confused, so proud of its ignorance
    making no sense
    wind-driven and dark
    searching for the day without a yesterday
    in the hollow of time
    the null

  • Apple Valley Ranchos

    22 photographs (8 x 10 inches) and 1 brochure with a map. This is an album of promotional photographs and a brochure of a “Western-style” townsite and housing development in Apple Valley, San Bernardino County, California. Views of the small town of Apple Valley in the desert; interiors and exteriors of ranch houses; people in western clothing riding horses, dancing, and working with livestock.

    NotesTitle devised by cataloger. Photographs are stamped with date “1949” and “Apple Valley Photo Center / Ralph H. Cowles / Box D500 LVSR / Victorville, Ca.” Photographs were in a tooled-leather album cover with title “Apple Valley Ranchos” made by “Deere. Van Nuys, Calif.” The leather cover had mold, and has been treated and sealed. Photographs were removed from deteriorated plastic sleeves and kept in original order. The community of Apple Valley was developed by Newton T. Bass and Bernard (Bud) J. Westlund (not pictured).
    SubjectsHousing development.
    San Bernardino County (Calif.)
    Recreation.
    Architecture, domestic.
    Form/GenrePhotographs. (aat)
    Physical CollectionErnest Marquez Collection

    Digital Collection
    Photographs, Huntington Digital Library
  • Trees with Warbonnets

    Saltating sands
    Fluvial braids
    Eolian curves

    Beauty, of course.
    Lightly veiled; delicate and delicate
    intricate and complex

    set in a silver mantle
    beneath blue upon blue
    blue within blue
    deep and forgetful
    changing ever so gradually

    extended wings
    cupping the sky
    lift
    lifted
    and aloft
    in flight . . .

    feathers like fingers
    fanning in flight
    a single feather loosens and falls
    twisting, circling, swirling,
    and falling in the anonymous wind.

    soaring above the mountain cirque
    not a cloud can be seen
    and always below

    hot-headed leopard lizard
    trees with warbonnets

    snakes eat rats
    then chase their tails
    coyotes eat rabbits
    then chase their tails
    the desert lizards
    eat bugs and each other
    and wildflowers

    Saltating sands
    Fluvial curves
    Eolian twists

    —~ W. Feller

  • The Hottest Day

    It was the morning of the hottest day
    the thick, warm, air began to weigh
    heavy on God’s creatures one and all . . .

    . . . so they hugged the shadows however small
    and found a hole to scurry in
    before the hottest day would begin.

  • vaguely woven forest

    in a vaguely woven forest
    greens and grays
    white and black
    silver, of course.
    a wayward band,
    small birds, sparrows of some kind,
    or tits perhaps.
    flitting and fluttering in silence
    from branch to branch to branch
    their busy order
    securing their place
    briefly holding court
    then disappearing
    into a vaguely woven forest
    .
    .

  • Under the Metallic Sun

    Invasive Species

    Halleck had zapped in here before. There was no point in attempting to figure out a time or how long ago anything was. There was space and that was strange because there had become a time of no time. There were infinities upon infinities of possibilities actually everywhere.

    Moving was simply a matter of being, and that was everywhere. That was how those big-winged birds could fly backward smoothly in jilted frames. The wind was a concern. It was spiraling at supersonic speeds. Mannequins were crying as pretend hands melted away swirling as a gaseous plastic mist into the voracious storm. There was no time, so unfortunately there was neither beginning nor end for the suffering mannequins.

    Halleck came to find his love, Betty Dont, which in itself was an omen.

    Under the Metallic Sun: Invasive Species
    (Mirror sun and stucco flower by Dennis Rudolph)

  • A Doorway and a Box

    Picture of a doorway.

    Garund sat on a stone sneering at Garamond. “Go through the door, Garamond,” Garund taunted. Before Garamond could respond, Garund was eaten by many insects. However, Garamond had already gone through the door and did not hear Garund’s muffled screaming and screaming and screaming for help. Even if Garamond could have heard this racket, he would not have been able to go back through because it was a one-way doorway and he had already chosen which way he wanted to go through. It would not have made sense for Garamond to go through the other way.

    Now, the next thing not to make any sense was that Garamond was holding a small ceramic box. He removed the lid and inside the was a little man playing a little piano. His name, in fact, was Don Piano. There was a little piano, a miniature candelabra, and Senor Piano was wearing tiny little cufflinks. Don Piano leaned close as to smile and show his exceptionally white teeth. They, his teeth, were impressive. Don Piano played on while the gorgeous Yolo Wednesday sang simple sweet soft swaying songs with her beautiful whispering lisp. . . “Do you realize you were just hypnotized?” asked Don Piano.

    As Don Piano played on bluebirds and blue butterflies emerged from the ceramic box of which it has been purposely unmentioned that the box was also blue. There are reasons for everything under the sun, including the shade.

    Garamond closed the box.

  • Neutopia

    Ringo floated above the plain
    lying
    on his back, of course.

    sparkling dark stars singing in hum and motion

    the pack of coyotes executed their plan
    poorly, however,
    and in a frenzy, they ate themselves next half-moon

    Wide, deep blue ribbons wave lazily in the echoes of evening

    these are events sworn to in an Affidavit
    in the Land of Null and Nothing.

  • Outsider

    Glodon had a problem with spontaneous pixelation. Glodon didn’t tell anyone. No one knew. Not a soul.

    One day, while raking the colorful autumn leaves, Glodon slipped around the corner for a smoke, pixelated, and then just disappeared.

    No one knew where Glodon went. No one looked because no one cared.

    Meanwhile, Glodon had slipped into a place where there was no space. Glodon’s conscience defined his existence. At any given moment in a universe without time anyplace becomes every place if there is an awareness of space.

    Glodon liked it. It made his nonexistent heart go fast.

    Glodon learned to control his pixelation. All he had to do was slip around the corner to have a smoke while raking colorful autumn leaves–flash-flash- he was pixelated.

    Glodon would do things while he was pixelated. He was there. He was in a space within a space that used no space inside of the space it was in. In a place where everyplace is everywhere anywhere can easily lead to anyplace. Time is just a place where time is all the time all at once.

    Glodon would create poetry while he was in this pixelated state. Here he could be a poet. He would write poorly contrived and awkward little rhymes;

    Blue
    Not blue
    Blue
    Not blue

    . . . and he was happy.
    .

  • Strange & Jagged

    This is a strange and jagged land. Its motives are clear; to do this and that. That always has been the purpose–this always will be the purpose.

    While you are here – To be. To exist. Which means also to flow, this way and that, as needs and forces dictate. This will always be the purpose in this strange and jagged life.

    W.Feller/J. Wilkendorf

  • Chaotic Heart

    This red thing
    This arrhythmic thing
    This beating heart
    Pounding and pounding, pounding
    Torn from the chest and held high
    in infrangible grasp
    in wild eccentricity
    Uncontrolled
    Sacrifice
    unbalanced
    This beating heart
    erratically pulsing wave after wave of deep, red light
    & silver, dull gray, ungreen
    under these painted skies
    Pounding, pounding, and pounding
    in wild eccentricity
    This Chaotic Heart
    This arrhythmic thing
    This red thing

  • The Letter

    Watching through the shattered glass
    to the broken heart, every day looked the same

    Swollen eyes and trembling lips could not bear to ask about the letter that never came. ~

    Walter Feller

  • On the Road

    I was out one day by wherever it is I was and shooting photos of the ‘this stuff’ and ‘that stuff’ out there and here comes this near-perfect little Volkswagen beetle. This car is just humming along, then all of a sudden it pulls over and this old guy asks where he can get some old-fashioned film developed. “Is there any place that still does that?” It took me a second (I’ve been shooting digital since the mid-90s) then I said “Walgreens” and that was kind of an ‘Aha’ moment.

    So we start talking and I find out this guy was an engineer on the aqueduct and he would survey elevations along the channel because the ground moves nearly continually out there in the far western part of the Mojave. It doesn’t move much but if the water in the aqueduct breaches the side it could get nasty and catastrophic and such. This was so engineers could regulate the flow and all that.

    We talk more. After a bit longer I find out this guy is Hugh Hefner’s first cousin. I think that is so cool and I mention the Baseball Hall of Famer Bob “Rapid Robert” Feller is my grandfather’s first cousin. That’s the best I got. He said he does not own a television. I ask if he reads a lot, is a writer or artist or how he stays occupied? He answered me with, “my equations.” How cool is that? So what he likes to do to relax is to try to work out cold fusion. I told him I like to take pictures and tell stupid jokes. And that is the day I met Hugh Hefner’s Cousin

  • Carol Highsmith’s Barstow

    Barstow, California

    Highsmith, a distinguished and richly published American photographer, has donated her work to the Library of Congress since 1992. Starting in 2002, Highsmith provided scans or photographs she shot digitally with new donations to allow rapid online access throughout the world. Her generosity in dedicating the rights to the American people for copyright-free access also makes this Archive a very special visual resource.

    Here is her photographer’s eye on Barstow, Ca. — 2012

  • Every Woodland

    Slip quietly through every woodland.

    There is the wind which may swirl through saplings and their parents
    and the tall grasses and dried flowers.

    Bird wings flutter, mostly away.
    Scratchings and rustling beneath the lowest branches and in the thick brier.
    Delicate colors as in a painter’s palette, aside, muted and subdued in a landscape held back.

    The memory flutters.
    The words choke well before reaching the tongue.
    So say nothing.

    ~ Walter

  • No Paraphernalia Required!

    The March 1915 issue of Motor magazine contained an article by A. L. Westgard on “Motor Routes to the California Expositions.” The following is an excerpt from that article:

    Owing to the recent improvement of the transcontinental routes, it is no longer necessary to load one’s car down with all sorts of paraphernalia to combat the many difficulties which formerly were strewed along the path, nor is it, in this day of dependable motor cars, necessary to carry a multiplicity of parts. Still, it is well to outfit with reasonably limited equipment to provide against mud, possible breakdowns, and climatic changes.

    To begin with, limit your personal outfit to a minimum, allowing only a suitcase to each person, and ship your trunk. Use khaki or old loose clothing. Some wraps and a tarpaulin to protect you against cool nights and provide cover in the case of being compelled to sleep outdoors are essential. Amber glasses, not too dark, will protect your eyes against the glare of the desert. You will, of course, want a camera, but remember that the high lights of the far west will require a smaller shutter opening and shorter exposure than the eastern atmosphere.

    Carry sixty feet of 5/8-inch Manila rope, a pointed spade, a small ax with the blade protected by a leather sheet, a camp lantern, a collapsible canvas bucket with spout, and a duffle bag for the extra clothing and wraps. Start out with new tires all around, of the same size if possible, and two extra tires also, with four extra inner tubes. Select a tire with tough fabric; this is economical and will save annoyance. Use only the best grade of lubricating oil and carry a couple of one-gallon cans on running-board as extra supply, because you may not always be able to get the good oil you ought to use.

    And, mark this well, carry two three-gallon canvas desert water bags, then see that they are filled each morning. Give your car a careful inspection each day for loose bolts or nuts and watch grease cups and oil cups. Carry two sets of chains and two jacks, and add to your usual tool equipment a coil of soft iron wire, a spool of copper wire, and some extra spark plugs.

    West of the Missouri carry a small commissary of provisions, consisting of canned meat, sardines, crackers, fresh fruit or canned pineapples, and some milk chocolate for lunches. The lack of humidity in the desert sections, combined with the prevalence of hard water west of the Missouri River is liable to cause the hair to become dry and to cause chaps and blisters on the face and hands as well as cause the fingernails to become brittle and easily broken. To prevent this, carry a jar of outing cream and a good hair cleanser. Use them every night.

    -.-

  • The Hanging of Jake

    Cowboy Jake was a drifter with a clouded past. It was said he killed seven men when he was down south in old Mexico. It was only four men, worthless sorts, but Jake reveled in the exaggeration. However, Jake’s real problems were shoplifting and petty thievery.

    I’m telling you . . .

    Once he stole his barber’s glass eye. He sold it to pay for the bandages to stop the bleeding coming from where his earlobe used to be. Apparently, one-eyed barbers have no depth perception.

    Ultimately, Jake got himself hanged. It wasn’t for stealing the glass eye or killing the barber, or even killing those guys down in Mexico. The folks up in the sparse and treeless mesa country must have been pretty angry with old Jake–they hanged him without a damned tree–just left him sort of sprawled across the ground. One end of the rope was tied to a rock and the other end noosed and cinched up around his skinny little neck. It is hard for me to explain exactly what went on, but Jake is dead just the same.

    Jake had the ‘cooties.’

    Jake probably picked them up when he was in a dusty cantina outside of Alvarez. Just about everybody down there had them. Damn ‘cooties.’The good news is that ‘cooties’ don’t live long up in the mesa country. The bad news is they didn’t have to hang Jake. The good news is the townspeople didn’t really give a damn anyway.

  • Old Geology

    Antelope Valley Physiography

    Notes from: WATER RESOURCES OF THE ANTELOPE VALLEY, CALIFORNIA.
    By Harry R. Johnson – 1911

    The physiographic history of the buttes and heights of land east of the Antelope Valley is obscure. No such striking evidence of the origin of the region as that just presented for the Rosamond Buttes was found, yet erosion seems inadequate to fully explain the topography. It is tentatively suggested that this region of irregular buttes and shallow intervening valleys has been less deformed by depression or elevation than either Antelope Valley or the marginal ranges.

    Figure 1 is a purely theoretic representation of what are believed to be the main blocks and faults involved in the production of the larger physiographic features of the Antelope Valley region. The small northwestward-dipping block in front of the Portal Ridge block, represents the Antelope Buttes near Fairmont. As the tuffs on the west side of these buttes dip at angles of 35° to 55° northwestward a direction at right angles to the San Gabriel fault system—it is assumed that the underlying granite has been tilted in accordance with the Tehachapi rather than the San Gabriel faults.


  • Wallflowers

    The Wallflower Collection

    A collection of historic and vintage photographs by a variety of photographers reworked and colorized. Working with these old photos like this has given me reassurance that the things I see, they would have seen in much the same way.

  • These are the Days

    There are those memories of the autumnal winds when seasons turn upside down and the icy drama of the silver winter threads through the hollows between trees stirring last year’s brown leaves into a low ruckus and crackle. Thin and bare sycamore branches, delicate and bony, trace low and lonely moans in their dark choir. Pink sand from the nearby riverbed salted everywhere and anywhere; grit flecked in your hair, in your shoes, in your eyes. These are the days. These were the days. These are the heartfelt and kind memories of these days.

  • California Southern

    The importance of our railroad

    The Southern Pacific had a monopoly on Southern California’s Transcontinental Railroads. Nothing came in or went out on any other rails than Southern Pacific rails.


    However, the Southern Pacific at Needles needed to connect with the bridge at the Colorado River to the Atlantic and Pacific. In order to do this, they worked out an agreement wherein the Atlantic & Pacific could use their rails to ship to and from San Francisco. Southern California still remained in a monopoly.

    San Diego wanted a share in the rapid growth of the state. With the high cost of getting there, most tourists simply stopped in Los Angeles.

    The California Southern, backed by investors from Boston, built from San Diego to Colton, but the Southern Pacific delayed their progress further north for over a year in what became known as the ‘Frog War.’ ‘Frog’ is the term for a rail crossing rail assembly so that either track can cross the other.

    Formidable, but not impossible, building through the Cajon Pass to the Mojave River, through the upper and lower narrows, and then along in the same direction to Waterman, now known as Barstow. San Diego now had the benefit of a link to a transcontinental railroad and Southern California had a competitive transportation network.

    W.feller.

  • The object of the Route Map

    MAPS AND SURVEY – 1913
    BY ARTHUR R. HINKS, M.A., F.R.S.

    CHAPTER III
    route traversing
    The Explorer’s Route Map

    The first care of a traveler who passes through an unknown, or partially explored country, is to make a record of where he has been, and of the main features of the country along the route by which he has traveled. Often singlehanded, encumbered by transport, compelled to keep to the track, and unable to leave his party, he cannot hope to make anything in the nature of a map, in the ordinary sense of the term. But for his own guidance, to avoid getting lost, he is compelled to determine his position day by day in much the same way that the position of a ship is determined at sea, by observation of the Sun and the stars, so that he is able to say roughly in what latitude, and perhaps in what longitude his halting places were. Moreover, as he goes along he is able to make such observations of the shape and course of his path as to enable another man coming after him not only to arrive more or less at the same place but to follow the same route. And finally, he can keep a sort of running record of the things that lie immediately to the side of his path. All this is done by the construction of a “route traverse” or “route map.”

  • Old Crump

    In 1849 a wagon train bound for California split up with many of the members opting for a supposed shortcut to the goldfields. The shortcut did not work out and these intrepid wanderers found themselves stranded, lock, stock, barrel, and four children on the floor of a place that would become known as ‘Death Valley.’

    Bennett’s Long Camp

    Over a month of hardship and waiting had passed while two heroic young men walked to find a way out and return with supplies in order to bring this band of Lost 49ers to safety. This they did, returning with food, a white horse, and a one-eyed mule. Sadly enough, the white horse had to be abandoned at a dry fall in the Panamint Mountains.

    With these heroes returning they could now make their escape. The children were weak, tired, and sick and would not make the trip if they had to walk, so the pioneers sewed several shirts together making saddlebags to carry them in.

    The children were uncomfortable and sick. They cried and cried, but ‘Crump,’ the ox selected to bear this burden seemed to sense the importance of carrying its cargo as gently as possible, never missing a step, stumbling, or even making a sudden, jarring move.

    This ordeal, beginning late in 1849 and finishing up early in 1850 then became a distant memory to the members of the party.

    Years later, a much older William Manly, one of the two heroes that saved the emigrants (John Rogers being the other), was walking down a road in the central valley. He noticed that over in a shady pasture there was a fat ox relishing the long, tender blades of grass. Strangely enough, the ox looked vaguely familiar. Sure enough, it was Old Crump, warm and gentle as ever.

    Back in 1850, when things settled after their hardship-fraught journey and arrival at their destination, the owner of the ox retired the creature as a reward for its distinguished service and Crump never worked a day in its life again.

    Chapter XI – Death Valley in 49
    Wm. Lewis Manly

  • Summit Valley IV

    Summit Valley I, Summit Valley II, Summit Valley III

  • Summit Valley III

    Summit Valley Gallery I, Summit Valley II, Summit Valley IV

  • Summit Valley II

    Summit Valley I, Summit Valley III, Summit Valley IV

  • Summit Valley I

    Summit Valley II, Summit Valley III, Summit Valley IV

  • Tesseract

    The shape of the Mojave is formed by everything that is not Mojave.

    Ocean Woman rose naked from the sea.  She became the mountains and valleys and glistened as she slept under the moon. She became awake as the sun rose and warmed her. That is what I heard.

    Clouds pass by here, everything passes by; shadows, people. It is just desert.  discord, strife, conflict, contention, Jangled trees in discord, sticks, twigs, gray plants that are most likely dead, not that they ever had a chance, or did they?

    Patience, Brother. Listen to the raging and eroding wind–with its grit and dust–it will help you to know peace–that anger has no use for ascent.

    We come to the desert by different paths at different times for various reasons, this is how the weaving begins. The weaving. The constant weaving and braiding and twisting and tying of stories and realities and things in between. 

    This is the land, too. One place becomes another gradually or immediately or maybe something or somehow in between. Everything is the same and everything is different and sometimes that is just by a little bit–little by little–until everything is different. The geology, the plants, and animals–the rare raindrops scattered about on the playa surface attacking the bare earth in numbers so large the washes do not understand the burden they are about to hide beneath.  This is the desert. 

    Coyotes laughing. Rats that are cannibals. Lizards that spit venom. Carnivorous insects — I wish!

    This is transformation upon transformation.  Metamorphosis.

    Painful youth with poignant memories newly scarred, not forgotten, but pushed aside. Here, however, one may clear themselves of the entanglements others twist around us, to distract us, to hamper us. We grow within our chosen realities here.

    Time is multidimensional and multidirectional. We have our own time and we are within our time and be inside and outside at the same time. Our time is our time and others try to take that time from you for themselves. Each falls into and overlaps with the others.

    We learn to leave it all behind. Luckily enough, alone. 

    There is the final question, I calculate–Really?

    It seems to be a thousand years, now. 

    Laughing coyotes, brotherhood.

    Observe the puzzle pieces we are assembled of, each moment of us can be examined from each particle separate or in context within the pieces that are made up of groups of pieces in a gradient fabric made in context within those around us and without. The bighorn sheep are also gregarious beasts.

    All the while, the desert is art.

    Break it all into pieces and look at the pieces.

    Possibly unnoticed, we change and become a different creature, a different being.

    You have to grow. There is no choice if you indeed exist.  There will be two paths and you will take one, however, even if you took the other path you would end up where the first would go; over there. 

    At least you know that if not directly, there will be some kind of connection between this way and that way over there. There is nothing that says you will end up better if you go one way or the other–one way is neither right nor wrong–possibly–you will, however, end up where you are meant to be. That can be a horrible shame.

    And over there, either way, will be the same thing repeated, only in a slightly different light

  • Echoes

    Jagged shards of odd gray clouds fall from shattered skies–puzzling, spinning, whirling, tumbling in the wind.

    Echoes upon echoes and echoes within echoes within echoes as they may be.

    Near the edge
    On the edge
    Over the edge

    Emotions
    Worthless things.
    Over the edge, they go
    emotional avulsion
    hollow anxiety
    Aloneness.

    Over the edge
    On the edge
    Near the edge

    One lump or two?
    the Hostess asked.

    That is not a snake. That is an omen.